Twenty years ago, this week, I got on a plane in Johannesburg, South Africa where I was raised and flew to London, UK, a city and country that I’d never been to, with the intention of living and working there for the next 2 years. I was very “green”, didn’t have a clue about living in a different country. Although South Africa was the 3^rd country I’d lived in, I’d always moved with my parents…this time I was alone.

My family thought I’d be home within 3 months (I only found this out years later), but I ended up living in London for 14 years. 20 years later, I have lived in 5 additional countries over 3 continents and have still not moved back to South Africa.

I arrived in London with baggage and I’m not talking about the Samsonite kind! I was messed up, rebellious, ignorant, young, confused, without direction and making bad decisions at every turn that resulted in less that savoury circumstances and taking me further into a place I didn’t want to be. I’d been hurt, cheated on, lied to, overlooked, lonely, overwhelmed and was totally lost.

My best day was when I walked into church and gave my life to Jesus. I was sitting right at the very back of the church, at the highest, furthest place from the stage, but I was not invisible or unnoticed by God. On my recent trip to London, I sat in the same church, in the same place and it brought back so many beautiful, life changing memories that words cannot describe….it left me speechless and a little teary too.

Of all the things I’ve learnt over these last 20 years, by far, the greatest thing I’ve learnt and continue to learn is that God is faithful in ALL things, at ALL times. Even when I am not, He is!

His hand has always been over me even when I was not walking with Him and when I was messing up BIG time. His protection has been evident time and time again. He answers my prayers above and beyond what I think is possible. He doesn’t want to leave me where He found me.

He brings freedom, is always with me, forgives me, showers me with mercy and kindness, calls me by name, comforts me, stills me, guides me, heals me, delights in me and He loves me like no other.

I know that wherever I may find myself in the future, there He will be also, as faithful and as sure as always. My only constant.

 

Definition of Value:

A quality that gives something special worth and importance, having esteemed characteristics or qualities, of great use, something to be cherished. Value determines what something is worth.

When it comes to our value as women, who sets the bar? What causes our value to increase or decrease? Who says our value wavers? Where does the idea of diminished value come from?

We’ve all experienced being disliked, judged, compared and rejected. We’ve all made mistakes and unwise decisions. These experiences, the words spoken to and over us and the consequences lead us to question our value because we are left scarred by them.

I was at a conference in London a few years ago where the speaker took out a brand new £20 note and everyone agreed that the value of that crisp new note was £20. He folded the note and we all agreed that the note still held its £20 value. He crumpled up the note and we agreed that the value remained £20. He then threw the note on the floor and proceeded to stand on it and rub the dirt from his shoes onto it. He picked up the note and started to unravel the now folded, crumpled, dirty note and asked us whether the note had lost any value – the answer? NO! It was still worth £20

In the same way, no matter what we’ve done or what has been done to us, we never lose our value. NEVER!!

We will ALWAYS have special worth, ALWAYS have esteemed characteristics and qualities, ALWAYS be of great use (purpose), ALWAYS cherished! Just because we are crumpled, bent over or dirty in our pain and shame, it doesn’t change our value in His eyes. Romans 8:1 says “For there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”

God knows us, He sees ALL of our mistakes and failings and loves and values us still (Psalm 139). God delights in us and rejoices over us (Zephaniah 3:17). God never forgets us (Isaiah 49:15 & 16). God sets us apart, we are appointed by Him, we are approved of (Jeremiah 1:5). We are more precious than rubies (Proverbs 31:1). We have been chosen by God (Isaiah 41:9). We are fearfully & wonderfully made (Psalm 139:13). He has amazing plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11). He knows our needs and provides our needs before we even ask Him (Isaiah 65:24). His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:23). You are altogether beautiful in every way (Song of Songs 4:7). NOTHING separates us from the love of God (Romans 8:35). His banner over us is LOVE (Song of Songs 2:4).

The value of something is determined by the cost that was paid and we were purchased by the blood of Jesus. The ultimate highest price was paid! If God sent His one and only son to save us (John 3:16), imagine our value! Our value is intrinsic, instilled by God.

I was born in Mozambique and raised in Zimbabwe and South Africa. There is no denying that Africa is in my blood!

Life in Africa can be complex, challenging, scary, unsettling, unsafe, politically unstable and at times overwhelming.

But there are many, many beautiful things about Africa – the sunsets are like no other I’ve ever seen (how my heart misses African sunsets!), the red sand that gets in everywhere is a sign of the richness of the land, the abundance of African languages you hear throughout the day, the unique and creative tribal dancing, the beautifully hand crafted and colourful art, the celebration that is a braai (BBQ) regardless of the weather, the great outdoors to be enjoyed however you wish: watching rugby or cricket, taking a hike up mountainous terrain, swimming in the ocean, coming up close and personal with an elephant, lion, rhino….you name it! And of course, the African bus! Yes, the African bus!

The buses in Africa are like most buses in other countries. The beauty of the African bus however lies in the rules and the attitude of the bus……No matter how full the bus, no matter who is on the bus, people will squeeze in and be uncomfortable in order to make room for someone else. There is always room for ONE more! Nobody complains, nobody questions the possibility of another person fitting in or even the safety of it, it’s just a given that there is room!

Regardless of age, race or sex, regardless of social standing, political views or upbringing, regardless of education, culture or experience, we as Christians should have this same inclusive heart towards others. A heart that embraces, that includes and that makes room for ONE more!

Romans 15:7 says “ Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God” ESV

Romans 2: 11 says “ For God does not show partiality.” ESV

Philipians 2:4 says “Don’t look out only for your interests, but take an interest in others too.” NLT

Matthew 10:40 says: “Anyone who receives you receives me, and anyone who receives me receives the Father who sent me.” NLT

Hebrews 13:2 says “Don’t forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it” NLT

During my time in Kiev, Ukraine, I was working with, living with and doing life with girls a lot younger than me and there were times when I just wanted some friends that could relate to me and the place I was in at the time. I was 40, single and in a foreign country. I recall standing in my kitchen and crying out to God for friends my own age, but I was only surrounded by young women. God’s response to me was “serve them”. I was stunned! That wasn’t the answer I was looking for or expecting. But, what a revelation!!

If generations are important to God, then surely, generations should be important to me!

You don’t need to be past a certain age to impact the next generation. Don’t be deceived into thinking that you have nothing to offer. There is always someone younger than you that needs what you have.

Some questions I’ve asked myself are:

To be the woman that extends my hand to the next generation, what do I need to do? What do I need to be? What do I need to say? What do I need to believe? What does the next generation need from me? How can I serve them?

The next generation needs me to set an example! (Titus 2:3-5)

There are some really practical things that I can do, such as having an outward focus that ensures I seek out the next generation. I can listen to them, make time for them, speak life and encouragement to them. I can believe in them and have a servant heart towards them, but as an older woman in God’s house, I have a responsibility to let them know God’s heart is towards the generations!

The next generation needs to know of God’s unfailing love! (Deut. 5:10 & Exod. 20:6)

The next generation needs to know that God’s covenant with them is everlasting, and that He will ALWAYS be their God! (Gen. 17:7)

The next generation needs to know that miracles await them! (Psalm 71:8)

The next generation needs to know that God is faithful to ALL generations! (Psalm 100:5 & 119:90)

The next generation needs to know that God is unchanging from generation to generation! (Lam. 5:19)

The next generation needs to know that they have been called (summoned) by God! (Is. 41:4)

The next generation needs to know that God is forever on His throne! (Psalm 102:12)

The next generation are growing up in a world that is rapidly changing, transient, temporary and disposable. The only constant is GOD!

**Scriptures mentioned are below from the NLT Bible.

Titus 2:3-5 says: “Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honours God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers. Instead they should teach others what is good. These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes and do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God”

Deuteronomy 5:10 & Exodus 20:6 both say: “But I lavish unfailing love for a thousand generations on those who love me and obey my commands”

Genesis 17:7 says: “I will confirm my covenant with you and your descendants after you, from generation to generation. This is the everlasting covenant: I will always be your God and the God of your descendants after you”

Psalm 71:18 says: “Let me proclaim your power to this new generation, your mighty miracles to all who come after me.”

Psalm 100:5 says: “For the Lord is good. His unfailing love continues forever, and His faithfulness continues to each generation.”

Psalm 119:90 says: “Your faithfulness extends to every generation.”

Lamentations 5:19 says: “But Lord, you remain the same forever! Your throne continues from generation to generation.”

Isaiah 41:4 says: “Who has done such mighty deeds, summoning each new generation from the beginning of time?”

Psalm 102:12 says: “ But you, O Lord will sit on your throne forever. Your fame will endure to every generation.”

Yes, I spell it with a “U”!! 🙂

Growing up, I didn’t get on with my mom. We just didn’t see eye to eye and although we have many fun memories, the relationship was very, very strained. I loved her but I disregarded her in many ways.

If I’m honest, I judged her without understanding her and in my immaturity and selfishness, it didn’t occur to me.

Was she a bad woman? No.

Did she make mistakes as a mom, just like every other mom makes mistakes? Yes.

Did she love me? OH YES!

I was sitting in church one day when my pastor said that honouring your mother and father doesn’t mean that you have to agree with them, but you must honour them. I didn’t understand what that meant or what it should look like, so I turned to God’s word.

Exodus 20:12 says: “Honour your father and mother: then you will live a long, full life” (NLT)

There it was in black and white – but day-to-day, what did that look like? What did that actually mean? I was living in London and my mother lives in South Africa! How was this going to work?

The definition of honour is this: To treat with honour, to show a courteous regard for, the quality of knowing and doing what is morally right, a way of address, giving recognition to, to show respect towards.

It’s a choice to honour someone and I made the choice to start honouring my mother. It wasn’t always easy because this meant changing my actions, my reactions and my thinking. I started reaching out to her more by calling or sending text messages. I started listening more and actually getting to know my mother and what made her tick. I started being kinder to her, encouraging her, loving her and God changed my heart towards my mother.

I sought forgiveness from my mother, which she gave so graciously and beautifully. I am so thankful to God for this second chance with my mom.

My mother and I now share a very special relationship – we don’t agree on everything and we don’t have to, but God truly has brought reconciliation and restoration as only He can when we obey Him.

 

 

I was living in London when I became a Christian. My life was a mess. My friend had invited me to church a few times and I finally went as I felt I had nothing to lose. That day in February 2005, I gave my life to God!

I’d love to tell you that everything changed from that moment, but it didn’t. So now I was a Christian….what did that mean? For the next year, I went to church every Sunday. I’d walk in and walk out not daring to speak to anyone. I was so ashamed and living with so much guilt about my past and I thought that if anyone knew the truth, if they knew the real me, it would all be over. You see, I’d become a Christian, but I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t see myself as God saw me. I saw the bad, the dirty, the shameful, the lack, the insecurities, the failure. All I saw was my past.

It was a sad day when I realized that the message in my heart was that no-one would ever stay for me. No-one would love me, accept me, embrace me and stay for me. To this day, whenever I think of that specific moment in time, my heart hurts.

I remember asking God who I was. Who did He say I was? What did His word say about me?

And God answered with words, these words…

Gracious ** Wise ** Healthy ** Submissive ** Vulnerable ** Intimate ** Patient ** Strong ** Alluring ** Free ** Welcoming ** Forgiving ** Secure ** Merciful ** Fiercely Devoted ** Kind ** Tender ** Inviting ** Peaceful ** Humble **

Did I think I was any of these? No!

What I loved though is that each word brought peace to my heart. I can’t explain it, it’s just something that God does.

I didn’t share this part of my journey or these words with anyone for 3 years. Then one day a beautiful friend and I were sharing and I showed her the words and told her my story. A few days later, she asked me to email the words to her. For my birthday that year, she painted the words onto a canvas for me . The picture header of my blog is a photograph of that canvas.

I’ve always referred to that canvas as a description of the feminine heart…….so what better name for my blog!

 

 

The Israelites had been enslaved in Egypt for 430 years. After suffering 7 plagues at the hand of God, Pharaoh ordered the Israelites to get out of Egypt. God chose Moses to lead the Israelites to the Promised Land.

Exodus 13:17 & 18 says: “When Pharaoh finally let the people go, God did not lead them along the main road that runs through Philistine territory, even though that was the shortest route to the Promised Land. God said, ‘If people are faced with a battle, they might change their minds and return to Egypt’. So God led them in a roundabout way through the wilderness toward the Red Sea. Thus the Israelites left Egypt like an army ready for battle.” (NLT)

Exodus 13:21 & 22 says: “ The Lord went ahead of them. He guided them during the day with a pillar of cloud, and He provided light at night with a pillar of fire. This allowed them to travel by day or by night. And the Lord did not remove the pillar of cloud or the pillar of fire from its place in front of the people.” (NLT)

These scriptures spoke several things to me:

• No matter what the situation, God has a plan.
• He knows the battles that lie ahead so sometimes He needs us to go a longer route so as not to engage in a battle that He does not intend for us.
• Sometimes God needs to take us the long way around so that we are not tempted to go back to the place we’ve been.
• Sometimes when God takes us the long way around we need to be prepared for battle – even if that battle never comes.
• Sometimes the long way around feels like the wilderness.
• The place that God leads us to can appear as impossible as the Red Sea looked to the Israelites.

BUT

• God goes ahead of us always & He guides us.
• He provides light for us in our dark times and our dark places.
• He gives us the freedom to move (the Israelites travelled by day or night….God allowed it).
• He never removes Himself from the path that we are walking.

No matter what is going on in your life today, whether it is work, family, marriage, financial, singleness etc., God is as faithful to us today as He was to the Israelites back then!!

His word tells us in Hebrews 13:5 “Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you”