Yes, I spell it with a “U”!! 🙂

Growing up, I didn’t get on with my mom. We just didn’t see eye to eye and although we have many fun memories, the relationship was very, very strained. I loved her but I disregarded her in many ways.

If I’m honest, I judged her without understanding her and in my immaturity and selfishness, it didn’t occur to me.

Was she a bad woman? No.

Did she make mistakes as a mom, just like every other mom makes mistakes? Yes.

Did she love me? OH YES!

I was sitting in church one day when my pastor said that honouring your mother and father doesn’t mean that you have to agree with them, but you must honour them. I didn’t understand what that meant or what it should look like, so I turned to God’s word.

Exodus 20:12 says: “Honour your father and mother: then you will live a long, full life” (NLT)

There it was in black and white – but day-to-day, what did that look like? What did that actually mean? I was living in London and my mother lives in South Africa! How was this going to work?

The definition of honour is this: To treat with honour, to show a courteous regard for, the quality of knowing and doing what is morally right, a way of address, giving recognition to, to show respect towards.

It’s a choice to honour someone and I made the choice to start honouring my mother. It wasn’t always easy because this meant changing my actions, my reactions and my thinking. I started reaching out to her more by calling or sending text messages. I started listening more and actually getting to know my mother and what made her tick. I started being kinder to her, encouraging her, loving her and God changed my heart towards my mother.

I sought forgiveness from my mother, which she gave so graciously and beautifully. I am so thankful to God for this second chance with my mom.

My mother and I now share a very special relationship – we don’t agree on everything and we don’t have to, but God truly has brought reconciliation and restoration as only He can when we obey Him.